Last Saturday, the headlines of the Sevilla Fútbol Club that jumped to the What’s-his-name-now (I’m not going to google it to find out) Metropolitano left a terrible image, something that was clearly reflected in the subsequent headlines of the sports newspapers.
Since it is not in our power to make them improve substantially with the former, let us stay with the latter, which we can comment on, squeeze, modify at will and, above all, extract the truth from them. These are some of those who have walked through the sports covers in recent days:
ACUÑA: “WE EXCEEDED ALL LIMITS; THEY GIVE US THE TOOLS AND WE DON’T UNDERSTAND THEM”
And that’s why Sampaoli has to write entire pages with the instructions to read as he goes on the pitch? Wouldn’t it be easier to come with the instructions read and learned from home?
“They give us the tools and we don’t understand them.” Acuña reminds me of my brother-in-law every time he comes back from Ikea.
THE JUDGE DISMISSES THE MEASURES REQUESTED BY DEL NIDO
This is the typical headline known in the newspaper world as “Groundhog Day.” It doesn’t matter when you read it. It’s always the same. I bet you can’t remember which season you first read this headline… Well that’s it.
DEL NIDO: “THE COURT’S ARGUMENTS ARE FLAWLESS. NOTORIOUS FACTS DO NOT NEED PROOF”.
Dear girls, dear boys: do not waste your precious time studying Law or, later, practicing law. Notorious facts do not need proof. Faced with the questionable presumption of innocence, nothing like wielding a forceful “white and bottled” in time, an incontestable and irrefutable legal argument of the first order.
SEVILLA FC, BEFORE A HOLE OF TWENTY-SIX KILOS
“Well, if that’s the hole, how can it not be the donut!” exclaims my brother-in-law from his experienced knowledge of modern football in particular and mass sport in general.
More than a donut, it looks like a mill wheel that more than one of the high levels of the Club is going to have to eat. If the published figures are correct, I’m afraid we have Argentina left for a while. Go collecting dulce de leche to sweeten the drink…
MACHADA OF THE SUBSIDIARY IN ANTEQUERA TO CONTINUE DREAMING OF PERMANENCE
And if our women’s team had been the protagonist of such a feat, how would we have qualified it?…
Happy International Women’s Day, dear colleagues.
JORGE JESÚS: “SEVILLA IS THE REAL MADRID OF THE LJGA EUROPE”
For less serious insults they have closed more than one soccer field. Perhaps the Portuguese coach, to whom we do not deny the good intentions of his words, should be reminded that Sevilla FC did not need any refereeing help to win any of their European titles. Sevilla is the King of the Europa League on its own merits. And point. There is no comparison possible.
TOMORROW’S MATCH AGAINST FENERBAHÇE DECLARED HIGH RISK
Which comes to mean that, if you want to have a couple of drinks before the game, it is best to buy a lot in a supermarket, bazaar or junk shop and invite your friends in any corner of the surroundings of the Sánchez- Pizjuán, because it is more than likely that your favorite bar or club is closing it once again, as the supposedly competent authorities should do.
3,000 TURKS WILL ARRIVE IN SEVILLE TODAY TO SUPPORT THEIR TEAM
If you plan to take a walk downtown this morning, we invite you to practice this simple visual acuity exercise:
Out of the entire Turkish expedition, how many bald fans are you capable of discovering?
There will be a prize for the winner. Call it a prize, call it a voucher for a hair transplant…
SEVILLA FC LEAVES THEIR PASS TO THE QUARTER ROOMS CLEAR AFTER A MORE THAN MERITORY 3 – 0
(I put this phrase to warm up in the band with the hope that it will be headline tomorrow at around eleven o’clock at night in all the newspapers of good faith)
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